March 20, 2009

March 20, 2009

Kari was once again given a bottle in hopes she would at least take some of the nutrition. Randall began to try feeding her and I was sitting at the bedside not really paying much attention. He called to me and said “Jeff, look she’s eating!” I turned to them with what I must admit was a rather subdued look and said- “Well let’s see if she’s able to continue”. Remember, to this point she has literally unable to eat because her respirations were too fast and she struggled so hard for air. Well, she continued to eat, her sats dropped a little to the mid 80′s but NEVER went below 85% for any length of time and she finished about 3oz of breast milk! Randall looked at me and said- “Jeff, she’s doing it, she’s eating and her saturations haven’t dropped, she’s actually keeping up!” After the bottle, she sat up in bed, started talking and played with her toys for about 2 hours!!!!!! The time now is about 2pm yesterday. She eventually “tired out” and went to sleep continuously for about an hour. This may seem like a small thing, but for the last 4 days, she had not slept for more than 20 minutes at a time because her respirations were so fast and she was “air hungry”.

Now I must admit in all honesty, I did not think much about this at the time. All I felt was a very small sense of relief. However, about 6pm that night, I began to think about the day, began reflecting on the good parts, bad parts, disappointments, and successes. I was writing in a journal I keep, just documenting the day’s events and suddenly, the enormity of what had happened hit me like nothing ever before! Call me crazy, call me making a mountain of a mole hill, but I absolutely believe your/our prayers were heard by God all mighty and he showed mercy! Those of you who know me know that not too much excites me, but let me tell you, excited is perhaps the understatement of the century. We asked, and were answered! If you were not a believer before this, I don’t know what else to say…..

Who would of thought I would be giving such a testimony…. honestly, I never thought it would be me- Jennifer, of course, but not me. Don’t take that as a weakness of faith, but that just has not been my role to this point.

I write this today because I want you to know that I am convinced God is with Kari and wanted to relay to you the “hard evidence” He has given for US ALL to that end. Not for a moment do I think this is about Kari, Me, Jennifer or for that matter, any individual- this is simply God at work and just another vehicle He has used to proclaim His power and Glory. This gives renewed meaning to the words I said at Kari’s thank you dinner- “If you ever think you can’t make a difference, just look at his face….” Perhaps now I should add to this statement “If you ever think you can’t make a difference OR God isn’t listening, just look at this face. Whatever outcome Kari eventually realizes- good or bad, God is with her and he is responding to our requests! WOW!!!!

Before I close, she still has a long way to go; the road will be filled with peaks and valleys. I look forward to this journey with you all and will do my best to report both. As she remains critically ill and still has another open heart surgery ahead, I once again say thank you for the gift you have given us, and the mercy God has decided to show our family. Although I am writing this literally with tears in my eyes and a sniffling nose, for the moment, I have a sense of peace. I have not been to the hospital yet this morning and have not called Jennifer for a very specific reason. If I get there today and we have bad news or a setback, I did not want this to influence my decision to write you all and inform you of yesterday’s events because even if things are even worse today, it still DOES NOT take away the mercy we were shown yesterday. I hope future messages are just as uplifting and positive. Only God knows.

Enjoy the pictures.
Jeff

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